Publishers tell me that one of their most popular regular features are recipes so I thought I’d cook up one of my own. I guarantee it’s not a recipe you’ll find in any cookbook. My recipe has no artificial ingredients, it’s not instant-anything, there are no shortcuts, no contents are interchangeable like breadcrumbs and saltine crackers, you won’t find a similar recipe on any box or can and it requires more work than anything you’ve ever served. It’s a recipe for life.

First, you’ll need a large receptacle to mix all the ingredients. For this I’d recommend a patch of ground outside a small country town that cartographers forgot to include on any map. You don’t need an enormous ranch, but it should be big enough that you can’t see your closest neighbor. But you’ll always know they are there in case you need them.

To this parcel of land, mix in some kids. This recipe doesn’t stipulate how many, but it ought to be a number so that you can love them all equally. Somewhere on this parcel of land should be a spot for a large garden where your kids can grow. In this garden, your kids will harvest knowledge like the best things in life take a long time to ripen. Radishes (yuck) can be grown in three weeks but the really good stuff like strawberries can take 13 weeks and corn 14. Your kids will also learn that fresh fruits and vegetables are good for them and nothing in the world tastes better than something you grow yourself. They’ll also learn that a little dirt never hurt anyone and every time they sit down at the table to eat, they’ll thank God for farmers and ranchers.

Next, stir in lots of “stock” and I’m not talking chicken broth but stronger stock such as beef, lambs, pigs, ducks (the comediennes of the barnyard) and yes, even chickens. If possible, a gentle horse should also be mixed into this batter of beasts. It’s very important to enhance your recipe with dogs... lots and lots of dogs. What the child will learn from this conglomeration of critters is responsibility by having to feed and care for them. From the dogs they’ll also learn that they shouldn’t spoil animals or people by constantly offering them treats to shake hands with a stranger. They’ll also learn by doing daily chores that they’ll grow natural muscle which is far superior to that made by supplements, steroids, a gym or a barbell.

Introduce into this mix at the age of 8 the 4-H Club and later the FFA. Here they can learn all about parliamentary procedure, public speaking, how to judge a heifer or a hen and how to string a bead with a welder. Season your patch of ground with an old tractor that is always breaking down so your boy or girl can learn how to fix things. I’d remind every parent that many successful companies have been baked up in the family garage.

At least once a month, you’ll want to share this special recipe with all your family members that hopefully live in close proximity. There should be plenty of grandparents and lots of kids to drive everyone nuts. Don’t smother the kids with attention or they may spoil easily but stir consistently with lovin’ spoonfuls of affection. If you must add alcohol to the mix, it should be used sparingly and the only thing smoked should be the meat.

Serve your community and your country by joining Rotary, the Lions Club, Kiwanis, the Salvation Army or the U.S. military. Serving people will help you become more humble, honest and generous. Attempt to turn your passion into a career, find a spouse you want to spend the rest of your life with and never let your temper boil over.

If you must make a substitution in your recipe, instead of investing your time and money in professional major league teams become a loyal supporter of your local Little League or soccer squads. Buy an animal at the county fair and shop on Main Street instead of Amazon.

Age well and let this recipe simmer for several generations. Garnish with dignity and I think you’ll find it’s a satisfying, filling and healthy recipe for a life well lived.