Run the ham through your food processor. Add the rest of the ingredients except the bacon. Put a couple of slices of bacon on each sandwich. Enjoy.
You may think that’s not much of a recipe, but keep in mind that we folks who have to take care of Presidential duties aren’t able to spend much time in the kitchen when that duty calls. Besides, I used real ham instead of bologna – and I did it all left-handed, since I will never be washing my right hand ever again.